April 4, 2014

The following excerpts are from the article “Knowing How the Fairy Tale Ends” by Don D. on the Jonah website: … “One of the things same-sex attracted (SSA) men have suppressed and buried in shadow is parts of their own masculinity. Because much of what I’m in love with is a projection of my own masculinity that I have buried at an inaccessible depth, much of my passion is really about a desire to reclaim not the other man’s masculinity but my own hidden masculinity that I have projected onto another man. I have heard homosexuality described as an attempt to cannibalize the masculinity of the other man through sex. What is really going on is an attempt to heal the schism within myself, to reconcile myself with myself and reincorporate back into my personality those parts of me I rejected at a very young age out of an existential fear of annihilation from parental rejection.”

“I also know that if I were unfortunate enough for a man I fell in love with to undergo the same emotional attachment to me, that eventually, try as I might, reality would have a way of breaking through. I then would be faced with one of two serious problems depending on which of us saw reality first. Either I would be trying to extricate myself from a relationship with a person I suddenly realized I don’t know and certainly don’t love; or I would be dealing with the heartache of being abandoned by someone who was still carrying my projection of the ideal masculinity I craved. A masculinity I indeed possess but have buried deep in my subconscious.” …